Pizza List
Have you ever ordered pizza with someone who’s incredibly picky and particular? Look at this customer’s immensely modified list. “Crust a little crisper than normal. But not too crispy, if that’s not vague enough – make it like you’re taking revenge on a cheating boyfriend, but you still want to reconcile in the not-so-distant future.”
As if that wasn’t enough, this person specified the delivery instructions. “The gate is tricky, please don’t break it. The spider on the porch is called Frank. Be nice to Frank. He guards the tomatoes.” Not to selves: Leave Frank alone. He’s a good egg. He protects those tomatoes with his little spider life. Now, that’s a strange pizza order.