Crisco Nightmare
There should be a prize for someone who can answer this question, “How much Crisco does it take to cover a drunk person?” The answer: Enough for the cops to have a hard time pinning him down! Hopefully, not a lot of people take this by heart as a means of avoiding being subdued by a cop.
But if you do use this as a technique to avoid cops, just think about how much Crisco you would need! That alone should discourage you because of how much money you would have to spend just to avoid the cops. Not a helpful thing, if we may say so.
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